PARKSTROLOGY 101: A Park Lore Primer on Disney Parks, the Zodiac, and the “Magic in the Stars”

Earth signs tend to be… well… earthy. As this element suggests, Earth signs are deeply connected (and thus, tethered) to the physical world. To Earth signs, there is one reality, and dreaminess and fantasy don’t always resonate. To some, that makes Earth signs appear narrow-minded; it means they lack vision; that they’re almost dogmatic in their adherence to realism, and may neglect their “inner child.” But many Earth signs have a secret longing for the spiritual or the paranormal, quietly hoping for a sign of the bigger picture they’re not always great at seeing. Whereas some parks make magic real, “Earth” parks make reality magical.

Taurus

Birth dates: April 20 – May 20

Again the “youngest” of the Earth signs, Taurus is ruled by Venus, the goddess of love and pleasure. And quite unlike the fire sign that precedes it, Taurus is all about serenity and prefers for things to stay the same. Taurus tends to be black and white in their approach, preferring things to be simple and uncomplicated. They focus on reality and typically don’t take on lofty or risky goals.

Sometimes unambitious, Taurus only acts when they’re certain it will go in their favor, defining their moments by “before” a change and “after” a change

Reveal Taurus park
Image: Disney

At the crushing intersection of reality, sameness, and timeline-defining changes stands Disney’s Hollywood Studios. Reality? That’s the harsh truth of its “studio” origin, developed in-utero as a peek “behind the scenes” of a real, working studio that never really worked. Sameness? Only a “Taurus” park could still be running no less than three stage shows that have run continuously for thirty years without a single notable update. Change? It must be that this park is continuously redefined by each new addition, culminating of course in Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge – a project that redefined the park… but admittedly, with a guaranteed home run and very little risk involved.

Virgo

Birth dates: August 23 – September 22

Virgo is not for sale. Put another way, Virgo is the sign that’s about integrity and personal sovereignty. Despite commonly being simplified as “neat freaks,” that image is really drawn from Virgo’s need for control over randomness. Virgos like to classify and order things; to observe life, and to synthesize things together harmoniously.

Seeking wholeness, Virgos tend to be to be incredibly sensitive and keenly aware of the harsh realities of the world

Reveal Virgo park
Image: Disney

The best fit here must be Disney’s Animal Kingdom, a park that plays off of deep and powerful ‘big ideas’ – the inherent value of nature and the story of humanity growing alongside and within it. The park’s starring feature (its animals) are interspersed among National Geographic-esque recreations of African and Asian villages, conveying the cultures and contexts of the natural world and the human world’s harmonious coexistence. Though (in true “Earth sign” fashion) the park initially addressed the “harsh realities” of the animal kingdom head on, it’s largely softened its delivery over the years.

And fitting Earth sign’s secret desire for the supernatural to break up the order they crave, the park’s never-built Possibilityland: Beastly Kingdom may never have made it off the drawing board, but the Modern Marvel: Expedition Everest and Pandora – The World of Avatar invited imagined creatures into the otherwise grounded park in big ways.

Capricorn

Birth dates: December 22 – January 19

The eldest of the Earth signs, Capricorn is symbolised by a fish-goat. The goat represents ambition and success while the fish symbolizes wisdom, and likewise the Capricorn brings impossible parts together. They seek wisdom gained from experience and quickly learn to play the long game. To that end, Capricorns may have hard childhoods, learning that luck and happiness are untrustworthy emotions early on until experience proves otherwise.

Capricorns have a burning sense of duty, and a desire to make the world better even if they have to suffer to prove that they themselves are worthy of happiness

Reveal Capricorn park
Image: Disney

Reviewing that, it’s hard to imagine any park better aligned to Capricorn than EPCOT. Literally bringing together two dissimilar halves (the industrial ambition of Future World and the cultural wisdom of World Showcase), the park has very much learned to play the long game. After its initial foundations began to crumble at its 10th anniversary (when sponsorship contracts began to expire), EPCOT has stuck in there with continuous reimaginings. While fans will forever debate the success of its once-glowing ambition to change the world, at least all can agree that the park has suffered… whether it ultimately reaches happiness is yet to be determined.

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